Eatery Hooters to Change Name

 A representative from Hooters restaurant chain who's name and address has been withheld at his request has confirmed a recent announcement that the establishment will be changing its name. Hooters, aptly represented by TWO headquarters in Atlanta, Georgia and Clearwater, Florida, has been servicing its customers since its inception on April 1, 1983 with a limited offering of questionably priced middle of the road menu items served by scantily clad "Hooters girls". The restaurant chain has faced increasing criticism recently that its business model is demeaning to women as well as being deemed a non-family friendly dining destination by a growing number of American families. Well, things may be changing for this mainstay in gentlemanly oriented entertainment. 
 "The times are changing and we want to stay in line with the standards of the day", says company spokesman Cleve Middlins. "We are moving into an era of good taste and high standards and Hooters wants to evolve with the times and present a more wholesome image to its tasteful clientele.
 "Until we can welcome anyone into our fine establishment we must create an environment that anyone can feel comfortable in, and I mean ANYONE!" emphasized Mr. Middlins. "Hooters is revamping its menu and the way it does business.
 "We are committed to providing an atmosphere to which anyone would feel comfortable bringing the entire family."
 The company has invested heavily in its new advertising campaign and is excited to turn a new corner. The restaurants will now be known as Cooters.

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